Taming Reactivity
Moving from reacting to responding as emotions are triggered.
Melancholic. Phlegmatic. Choleric. Sanguine.
- You say something that ticks me off;
- I get angry;
- I start speaking louder as my blood pressure rises and fists clench;
- You get angry at me, react in kind, and anything goes.
- You say something that triggers automatic physiological reactions in my body, including speaking louder, increased blood pressure, and the tightening of my fists.
- As my body automatically reacts, my unconscious mind registers these changes to my existing body state as an emotion.
- Your body is triggered by observing my physical reactions and, in turn, begins to automatically react accordingly. As your body reacts, your unconscious mind, as did mine, registers these changes to your existing body state as an emotion.
- Within seconds, each of us - at our own pace - becomes consciously aware of the shifts in our body states. We begin to progressively notice what is happening physically, both within ourselves and the other. As this happens, our unconscious minds perform memory checks to identify the feelings we're experiencing and observing in relation to our past experience and learning, then label our respective body states accordingly as "angry".
Curious for more?
Taming Reactivity previews part of one session from CONNECTION, part of the End Self-Sabotage series of virtual coaching programs. Check it out for details:
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Testimonials from
Robert's Clients

I highly recommend Robert as a Life Coach. He provided value in his ability to assess situation quickly and offer tools to achieve greater balance in my life. He made it clear for me to choose a course of action to gain positive change in my daily life. Robert is reliable, friendly, professional and a great listener. Working with Robert was a wonderful experience.
Nöemie Dupuy
Billy Mavreas

During a big transition time in my life, I started working with Robert to gain clarity and perspective to help me make some important decisions. He was instrumental in helping me structure my thoughts and ideas, refine my identity and move forward on my journey with certainty. Robert has an incredible ability to get to the source of a situation or dilemma, and has a knack for helping people exploit their own creativity and approach to solutions!
Justin Svatina

Robert's approach is insightful and light-hearted, and he has an excellent way of normalizing life's everyday challenges in a way that makes them seem much more manageable. He seems to have an endless supply of helpful tips on how to better manage your life and holds you accountable to the goals you set out for yourself. I leave every session with a fresh outlook and a clear understanding of what to do that week. For anyone seeking support and practical life-wisdom, you can't ask for anyone better! :)
Polina Gubnitskaia

Robert is a great life coach. I contacted him at a moment when I wanted to transition professionally and he was present to walk me through my options, to provide guidance and to support my decisions. He is a very good listener but also actively engages with you to give you just that other perspective or option, to share real-life examples, and to make you feel that your dreams can come true. I came out of every session optimistic and energized - I felt grounded but reached for the stars.
Cecilia Thompson

After a difficult period with my business and personal life, Robert was extremely helpful in guiding me to find joy in my work and peace with myself. He opened my eyes about a lot of ways to lead and to trust. When I think back on how I felt when I first walked in compared to one year later, I am impressed at how much change a person can go through when they are being guided by the right person.
Patricia Godley

Robert is one of those people that will change your life forever. When I started my sessions I was pretty much in a state where I had no hope for improvements and was even considering moving away from Canada! My professional burn-out was driving me crazy insecure about my career and the current company I am working at. After 3 months of weekly sessions, I am now in charge of my life once again and more confident than ever at work and with my art! My life is now moving forward and thanks to Robert.
Felipe Dunley
Creative Director, Sid Lee

Robert is an absolute delight and wonderful coach to work with, he is extremely professional and insightful. He helped me overcome many hurdles and see things in a new light. He is very positive, patient and resourceful. He brought plenty of humor into our sessions, I am forever indebted by his kindness. Please do not hesitate to engage him as your coach, I highly recommend him.
Sophiya Varghese
Senior Manager, Data & Analytics, TD

Robert has a wonderful way of connecting with people. His candidness, humor, and gentle advice make him easy to talk to. I also really appreciated the telephone consultations and extra effort he put in even when we were not in session. Thanks to him, our family learned to communicate with a better understanding and appreciation of each other.
Marianne Rodrigues
Co-Owner , VirtualE-There

I highly recommend Robert as a Life Coach. He provided value in his ability to assess situation quickly and offer tools to achieve greater balance in my life. He made it clear for me to choose a course of action to gain positive change in my daily life. Robert is reliable, friendly, professional and a great listener. Working with Robert was a wonderful experience.
Nöemie Dupuy
Billy Mavreas

During a big transition time in my life, I started working with Robert to gain clarity and perspective to help me make some important decisions. He was instrumental in helping me structure my thoughts and ideas, refine my identity and move forward on my journey with certainty. Robert has an incredible ability to get to the source of a situation or dilemma, and has a knack for helping people exploit their own creativity and approach to solutions!
Justin Svatina

Robert's approach is insightful and light-hearted, and he has an excellent way of normalizing life's everyday challenges in a way that makes them seem much more manageable. He seems to have an endless supply of helpful tips on how to better manage your life and holds you accountable to the goals you set out for yourself. I leave every session with a fresh outlook and a clear understanding of what to do that week. For anyone seeking support and practical life-wisdom, you can't ask for anyone better! :)
Polina Gubnitskaia

Robert is a great life coach. I contacted him at a moment when I wanted to transition professionally and he was present to walk me through my options, to provide guidance and to support my decisions. He is a very good listener but also actively engages with you to give you just that other perspective or option, to share real-life examples, and to make you feel that your dreams can come true. I came out of every session optimistic and energized - I felt grounded but reached for the stars.
Cecilia Thompson

After a difficult period with my business and personal life, Robert was extremely helpful in guiding me to find joy in my work and peace with myself. He opened my eyes about a lot of ways to lead and to trust. When I think back on how I felt when I first walked in compared to one year later, I am impressed at how much change a person can go through when they are being guided by the right person.
Patricia Godley

Robert is one of those people that will change your life forever. When I started my sessions I was pretty much in a state where I had no hope for improvements and was even considering moving away from Canada! My professional burn-out was driving me crazy insecure about my career and the current company I am working at. After 3 months of weekly sessions, I am now in charge of my life once again and more confident than ever at work and with my art! My life is now moving forward and thanks to Robert.
Felipe Dunley
Creative Director, Sid Lee

Robert is an absolute delight and wonderful coach to work with, he is extremely professional and insightful. He helped me overcome many hurdles and see things in a new light. He is very positive, patient and resourceful. He brought plenty of humor into our sessions, I am forever indebted by his kindness. Please do not hesitate to engage him as your coach, I highly recommend him.
Sophiya Varghese
Senior Manager, Data & Analytics, TD

Robert has a wonderful way of connecting with people. His candidness, humor, and gentle advice make him easy to talk to. I also really appreciated the telephone consultations and extra effort he put in even when we were not in session. Thanks to him, our family learned to communicate with a better understanding and appreciation of each other.
Marianne Rodrigues
Co-Owner , VirtualE-There